By P Mutuma
He texted you first. Replied fast. Kept the energy consistent. He made you feel seen. Wanted. Special. He flirted like you were the only woman in the world, gave you that cute nickname that made you smile every time it popped up on your screen. He called just to hear your voice. Checked in. Said all the right things. Told you he loved you… and somewhere along the way, you believed him.
So you let your guard down. You opened up. You trusted him with the softest parts of you. And without even realizing it, you got attached.
Then it changed.
The texts slowed. The calls became rare… or disappeared completely. The sweetness faded. No more random “I miss you.” No more late-night talks about everything and nothing. You felt the shift before you could explain it. That quiet pullback. That distance you didn’t ask for. But you held on anyway. Gave him space. Made excuses. Told yourself he was busy… even though deep down, you knew he wasn’t busy. He was losing interest.
The flirting stopped. The “I love you” vanished. The nickname disappeared like it never existed. He didn’t even end things properly. He just faded. Left you confused, hurt, replaying every moment in your head trying to figure out where it all went wrong.
And the hardest part is knowing how familiar this story is.
The love bombing.
The emotional high.
The slow withdrawal.
The cold silence.
The quiet abandonment.
He made you feel like everything… then left you feeling like nothing.
That kind of damage lingers. It makes you question yourself. Did I love too hard. Say too much. Expect too much. Was I not enough. But here’s the truth you need to hear… you were consistent. You were genuine. You showed up with an open heart, ready for something real.
He wasn’t.
Maybe he wasn’t ready. Maybe he was never serious. Either way, you didn’t lose him. He lost you. And that matters.
So if you’re sitting with a heavy heart and a mind full of unanswered questions, know this… you’re not alone. You’re not crazy. You’re not too much. You were just too real for someone who only knew how to pretend.
One day, someone will match your effort without disappearing. Until then, keep healing. Keep choosing yourself. And never let a man who couldn’t love you properly make you doubt your worth.
You deserved better. You still do
